Real Life Superheroes Descend Upon Seattle In Full Costume Wearing, Crime Fighting Nerdery

Originally posted: http://blogs.seattleweekly.com/dailyweekly/2010/11/rain_city_superhero_movement_d.php

>By Curtis Cartier, Fri., Nov. 19 2010 @ 6:00AM

Green Reaper, Penelope, Thorn, Thunder 88, Buster Doe, No Name, Catastrophe, Gemini and Phoenix Jones the Guardian of Seattle. These are the names of the costumed superheros who are now patrolling our city, ensuring your safety… I know. We’re excited too.

The PI reports late on Thursday that a group of masked vigilantes calling themselves the Rain City Superhero Movement has been patrolling Seattle streets for a few weeks now.

They wear costumes, they ride around in a Kia at night looking for trouble and occasionally, they get stabbed.

Seattle Police think they’re silly at best, dangerous at worst. They cite cases where one darkly clad crusader was nearly shot when he came running out of a park in the middle of the night, or when a woman saw a bunch of costumed freaks pull up to a gas station and thought they were there to rob the place.

“Phoenix Jones the Guardian of Seattle” seems to be the one member that the cops and the media have the most info on–and still, it’s not much.

We know he’s a 22-year-old man who met with police at the station last month in near full regalia: black cape, blue tights, black fedora, white belt and mask. He’d have brought the rest of his gear, he told them, but it was being repaired after he got stabbed trying to break up a drug buy.

But don’t worry. Jones tells the PI that he and his squad are professionals.

“I don’t condone people walking around on the street with masks. Everyone on my team either has a military background or a mixed martial arts background, and we’re well aware of what its costs to do what we do.”

The crew appears to draw a lot of its marching orders from the website reallifesuperheros.org.

That’s right, .org.

Also, another site noted by the police has an actual “manual” for becoming a super hero.

It’s packed with info on picking out fly crime fighting “threads” and weapons, assembling a kick-ass utility belt, keeping your “hero health” in tip-top shape and finding pressure points on your enemies that will render them incapacitated.

Nowhere on the site are any tips for finding a girlfriend or holding down a job.

It’s not clear how the Rain City Superhero Movement is alerted to crimes. They may have police scanners, they may have inside sources, or simply internet access to the SPD police blog. They don’t, at this point, have a skyward pointed spotlight of any kind or a direct line to Mayor McGinn.

But they do have our attention. And it’s likely that that’s all they wanted in the first place.

2 Comments on “Real Life Superheroes Descend Upon Seattle In Full Costume Wearing, Crime Fighting Nerdery

  1. Green Reaper, Penelope, Thorn, Thunder 88, Buster Doe, No Name, Catastrophe, Gemini and Phoenix Jones–I’ve never heard of any of these people until this article.

    Are these people even on the reallifesuperheroes.org, which they supposedly take their “marching orders” from? I don’t think so, either. (An actual confirmation on this would be nice, from someone who is an actual member of the aforementioned .org, that’s right, .org.)

    Also, many people decided to do the RLSH thing and then afterwards found out about the community.

    And speaking on that, I don’t know that they have much, if any, contact with the individuals in the established RLSH community. (Also, an actual confirmation from someone in the established community would be nice.)

    Nice fact checking, there, Mr. X–or did you even contact the site you are referencing in your article for a comment? (Confirmation, anyone?)

    These masked “vigilantes”–have they committed any crimes? One would think with the press coverage and police attention, they have not, or they would certainly have been apprehended by now, especially with their garish modus operandi. Their shocking appearance aside, I severely doubt they have “illegally punished an alleged lawbreaker” or “participated in a group which metes out extralegal punishment to an alleged lawbreaker.”

    Only then, by definition, would they be a vigilantes.

    Surely, if PJ had walked into the police station, and they had evidence that he was a “vigilante” and had committed crimes–surely he would have been arrested!

    PJ’s account of being stabbed has no witnesses other than himself. Its a claim, without even the evidence of the equipment that was in the shop.

    Any responsible person might question the validity of such a statement, barring tangible evidence.

    Also, Mr. X: Do you suppose on fly fishing sites, video game reviews, and foodie boards filled with recipes have advice on finding a girlfriend or holding down a job? Wait–that’s not their purpose.

    In fact, I’d find a site of people in superhero costumes trying to pick up dates or use their personae to find employment rather hilarious.

    Do you suppose individual military background or a mixed martial arts background, with nice biceps and perky pecs (assuming PJ is telling the truth and isn’t “padding”), has a better chance of holding down a job or having a girlfriend than, say, a reporter for a Seattle newspaper who uses the word “fly” as an adjective?

    No comment.

    But then again, details of your personal life, your sexual life, and your career prospects are your own business.

    FYI, Mr. X– plenty of people in the RLSH community hold down steady jobs, have girlfriends, boyfriend, spouses, and even entire families, complete with pets and children.

    I know this might be hard to believe, but please bear with me…

    Most RLSH serve pro-social missions. Much of that which the mainstream RLSH community does is composed of altruistic work, such as raising money for charities, or promoting causes or functions that benefit society, like blood drives or food drives or toy drives for underprivileged children, or things such as handing out blankets to the homeless–like Zetaman, frequent poster on the rlsh forum (pictured in your article, Mr. X).

    But all that is “nerdery”–right?

    If you had even bothered to look at the dozens of articles which came before, if you searched on Wikipedia, or went on YouTube, or did a Google search, prominent web sites such as The RLSH project, or even the CONTENT OF THE VERY WEBITES YOU SITE IN YOUR ARTICLE, you’d know this, Mr. X.

    You’ve generated a poorly researched piece of trash. And you’ve actually promoted the individuals you are so quick to ridicule, chide, and poke fun of exactly what they wanted–attention. All the while riding on this story’s sensationalist slant, directing attention to yourself without thought of the consequence or morality. You are no better than the people you condemn.

    And it’s likely that that’s all you wanted in the first place.

    –PZ

  2. Yup, complete nerdity.

    For the people who dress up in a silly outfit to go feed the homeless, they detract from the real heroes…the truly anonymous people who wear clothes like everyone else and feed the homeless everyday without trying to stand out in a crowd, or asking for recognition.

    Also, if one of you jackasses tried to bust me when I’m buying a bag of pot, I’d probably kick your ass and take your lunch money.